A Special Twelve Years!

My dearest Stephen,

Have you noticed that lots of great things come in 12's? Eggs come by the dozen. Twelve inches makes a whole foot! There were twelve tribes in Israel, and twelve disciples, so the number twelve was important to God too! This year marked a dozen years I've had with you. Wow! As always, money was tight this time of year--it always is with the end of the school year and beginning to prepare for the next year. Of course, a major difference this year was that we didn't go to the homeschool conference on Memorial Day weekend, so we were home to celebrate your birthday. Only . . . I didn't have any money. It was hard to watch you so excited, when I knew I wouldn't be able to do anything until the day OF your birthday. I couldn't prepare ahead . . . no presents, no cake, no decorations. Even the planning lacked a little as I have struggled to get through the end of the school year, complicated even more by all the events in your brother's year at the Academy. So there I sat on Friday morning after dropping your brother at school. I was trying to figure out how to redeem the day and make you feel as celebrated as my heart feels when I think of how much I love being your mom and having you as my son.

Then it came to me! The idea I proposed to you was quickly negotiated and embraced, and you told me all day long how much you loved it! We went on a shopping spree. I could laugh when I even call it that, since you wanted so little. The first thing we got was a big gift bag to fill up, only there were so few things you wanted, we could have done with a much smaller bag. First we hit Starbuck's and the grocery store to get coffee and donuts, then we went to several stores to find the things you wanted. We headed home for a little while for lunch and so AJ could have his tutoring done. Then we picked Josh up from school and wisked away to watch "Night at the Museum 2." Afterward we went to Cici's for pizza, then home to enjoy playing with your new games and shows. It was a simple day, but you genuinely loved it, which says volumes about who you are. You love simplicity . . . love being home and with family or alone.

The day after your birthday I took you out just the two of us, to a movie ("Wolverine") and to dinner. The day after that we celebrated with a big family party with us and the Borkos, just lots of noise and activity and fun! Matthias spent the night, and then you were completely satisfied with your special day(s). It is easy to see in this what I have long known about you--you are content to have a few very close relationships, and don't really need many of them. You like the "social scene" and have enjoyed the activity and excitement of being with the youth at church, but your preference is to just enjoy the people you love being around.

You've grown so much this year, in size (you now top the scale at over a hundred pounds!) and in skills. Your art work has come such a long way, and you love to spend hours drawing cartoons. You love all things boy! You giggle at explosions (go figure!), and love action movies more than anything. But you are quite the ham, and LOVE LOVE comedy of all sorts--from sitcoms to Garfield cartoons to blonde jokes. You are always cracking me up with some hilarious observation and comment, or with a new cartoon that reflects your ability to get inside the heads of those who draw your favorite comics.

Stephen, I love being your mom so much. You are so full of surprises. You are sensitive, and when I get down, you look for some way to help or encourage, even if it's just in holding my hand. In spite of your insistence, I dread the day that some cute girl takes away my snuggle bug, and I love all the affection you give me still. But I also love the ways you are changing--new conversations we get to have, new kinds of movies we can watch, and lots of new humor.

Happy birthday my dear boy! You are a delight and a joy!

Life According to Stephen: Chicks

As Stephen and I were driving home from the bank today we passed a sign at the feed store that said, "We have CHICKS!" Not wanting to miss an opportunity to razz Stephen, I said, "Hey, look! We could pull in there and get you a CHICK!" (Remember, girls are icky!)

Meanwhile, Stephen had seen the sign and started making chick noises, so he said, "They say cheep, cheep, cheep."

I answered, "No they are anything but cheap, cheap, cheap."

Stephen insisted, "They say cheep, cheep, cheep."

Thinking about it, I relented, "OK, maybe they do spend a lot of time calling you cheap, cheap, cheap."

Quickly Stephen got caught up in the joke and piped in, "Until they grow up. Then all they say is gobble, gobble, gobble!"

Where the Boys Are

Ahh, in working with Jr. High girls, I remember this song of my youth . . . how embarrassing! How I wasted so much time then!

Now of course it means something totally different. I realized as I was looking over my blogging that I haven't mentioned the boys of late. Since supposedly this whole blog is mostly about living with boys, here is an update:

Josh: has been faithfully and dilligently working through his first year of school away from home--at private Christian school. The homework load has been much less than I expected. I have discovered in him a very anti-establishment attitude. He questions every rule, every reprimand, every math fact, every instruction . . . the boys wants to know WHY!!! The hormones are a-raging, and he is mad all the time no matter what I do. I of course don't dare acknowledge that I belong to him in public . . . on penalty of death, I think. However he is making great grades, is working exceptionally hard (both at our after-school job where he helps me clean, and at home when I ask him to do some chore), is communicating with words his constant frustrations and irritations, and assures me that he still loves me (although sometimes I have to remind him I'm a girl and that I need to hear him say it). He's a great kid, and someone I truly respect and admire, although I'm a little concerned about a "crisis of faith" that he's battling right now as he searches for his own identity.

Stephen: Still very much the happy-go-lucky boy, just in a rapidly growing and always eating body. Stephen never finishes his schoolwork, but always seems to know more than me. He is still very sensitive, but as the pre-teen hormones are starting to stir, I see it emerge more as anger now than as tears (although sometimes the two appear together). Stephen's highly creative streak bounces from one interest to another: at the beginning of the schoolyear he was hard into stop-motion animation and computers, and now is drawing and sketching everything. Stephen's biggest challenge this year has been working via Florida Virtual School, which violates his free, impulsive, unconstrained approach to work. Nevertheless, he also is proving he is capable of doing "classroom" work, and is showing signs of improvement both in his computer skills and his art (the two classes he is taking are 2D Art and Keyboarding). Stephen's heart is still very tender to the Lord, and to those in need around him.

Andrew: AJ has been full of surprises this year. He was having great difficulty reading at the beginning of the schoolyear, but has made leaps and bounds in the last couple of months. Suddenly words are popping out all over the place, and when they do AJ tries to read them! School efforts are moving along now at a nice clip, so much so that he and I have started reading and studying anything we can get our hands on about the Colonial and Revolutionary period of American history. It has been fun seeing what he is learning once again beginning to take over his imagination. Andrew's latest endeavors have been book-writing. He starts many, though rarely makes it to the finish. However he writes and draws all day, intermitten with fighting imaginary enemies (and a couple real brothers) outside whenever possible. I love Andrew's energy, as well as his delight in snuggling and being with me. Maybe I baby him a little, but I figure that's OK. He does NOT get away with everything!

Having essentially three different ages and stages has kept me awfully busy. I'm trying to balance youth group, scouting on two levels, friend get-togethers (not playdates anymore!), this school event and that one, etc. I spend much of my life in the car. Fortunately I have kept their outside committments few, and they usually share events (like the older two both do youth group, the younger two are both in homeschool support group together and have scouting back-to-back at the same location). And after much prayer and discussion with Josh, it looks like we will probably all be home again next year for school. (Not so sure if that's a light at the end of the tunnel, or just the headlight of a train!)

Just so I'm clear, if you've placed a call and asked me for something, or if you want to catch up over coffee . . . we can schedule something . . . in about ten years!!!!

To My Precious Blonde Boy

Stephen,

I continue to feel badly that your birthday gets lost in the end-of-year shuffle every year. I'm thankful that we homeschool since having all three of you in school with activities and such would really make it hard to celebrate. I certainly have enough reasons to rejoice over the day you were born! You are such a delight to me. I love talking to you and seeing the energy and excitement on your face when you tell me something. I can hardly resist your creativity and your imagination. I hope that the way I celebrate having you every day helps make up a little for the way I tend to lose track of your special day each year. At least this year you didn't have to wait until December to have your birthday!



Ah, Stephen! Looking at old pictures of you brings back so many memories. You were such a fun baby and little boy! We never knew what new thing you would become, you dressed up so much. You were always surprising us with your mood too, and even now you can go from storm clouds to sunshine or the other way in a flash.

I feel sorry sometimes that you have inheirited some of my worst traits, but on the other hand, they come with so many wonderful strengths. You are a loyal friend, and it astounds me how long you and Matthias have been best buds. You are very sensitive to the feelings other people have, and you try to comfort them. You are always creating, lost in your own imaginary world.


One thing that amazes me is how you have changed. You used to be so bothered by little things--the texture of foods, sand on your feet, being hungry or tired. Now you tend to roll with the flow more. Of course, when you become emotional, it is hard to get you to calm down and think it through, but fortunately you can also be gracious and forgiving, and you like to be at peace with those around you.





You are still such a tough guy. You have always been the stereotypical boy--loving cars, balls, and "manly" things. You still love to be flying down the street on your bike or skateboard, and you are pretty daring. I think you have enough scars now that your modeling career is pretty much trashed, but you told me today (when you cut your head) that you'd rather have scars than stitches.




It's kind of funny watching you begin to grow into your own person. Lately you have developed a love for camera work, especially video and animation. You are quite a good artist, and you love to draw. You have decided you want to grow your hair out, which I have agreed to let you do.
You can't stand being cooped up all day inside, and you need to move frequently.


Stephen I love you so much. I'm so grateful that God chose to make me your mom. You might be the middle child, but your value and worth are certainly not less because of that. Please know that I love you and that I am eagerly awaiting to see how God continues to mold and shape you.

Happy birthday, kiddo.

Love, Mom

Watch Out Copola! There's a New Director in Town!

Last week the boys and I went to the two-day state homeschool convention in Orlando. (Thanks Mom!) Josh attended a teen conference run by Summit Ministries. I was eager for him to go and hear teaching on worldviews done by some of the most respected trainers of teens in the country. Stephen and AJ went with me to the convention, but the second day AJ decided to stay with the friends we spent the weekend with and play with their kids. Stephen and I had so much fun looking at stuff together, but I knew I was in trouble when he found a stop-motion video animation kit. It came with the camera for the computer and a very complete manual for a very economical price.

I ended up splitting the cost with him, and he made his first video today. He has already added narration and is hoping to add sound effects, but I need to help him do a little more research to be able to post the Windows Movie Maker version here. It is my hope that this summer he will begin learning more about movie-making. Several weeks ago he bought a low-end video/digital camera with money he had saved, and I'm beginning to think that with his interest in artwork and video, he has found a creative hobby that he could pursue further.

Notice that his video includes lots of car chases and fights. And yes, Doc Ock's head and hair did come off at the end. You'll probably see much more of this kind of stuff!

Camping Photos

From our recent trip:

No PS2. No WII. No TV. No bike or inline skates. What's a boy to do?

...Plenty!!! (I never heard "I'm bored!" the entire weekend!)

The boys made boats for a rain-gutter regata.

AJ didn't quite get the whole "don't use your hands" thing.

I was feelin' a might skeered when I saw this.

(For you Yankees, that's quite frightened!)

Getting ready to shoot arrows.

What else is there in life?

Makes a Mother Proud . . . .

Tonight, AJ was inventing a new computer. Something about it was small enough to fit on your wrist . . . I don't know, I didn't get it all. (After all, I don't invent computers! I can hardly use them!) Meanwhile, his brother Stephen was programming another computer with a new language . . . or ability . . . or something like that (once again . . . me and the computer . . . enough said).

All at once, AJ decided he wanted to use FOUR of his powers (never was really sure exactly what they were, but I caught something about stretchy, strong, and fire), but the problem with this was that in whatever contract they signed, Josh got to use double the powers of AJ . . . or more of them . . . so that meant Josh got to go to EIGHT of his. Somehow Stephen got short-changed in the deal, 'cause no matter what, he only got to use one power at a time. But . . . he had his computer!

Exactly how many powers do you need to fight off bad guys?

And if you have super powers, why on earth do you need computers?

Use Caution When Choosing a Movie at My House

I started watching Rocky Balboa yesterday, and decided it was a great movie for the boys. (And I wasn't wrong.) But here's what happened at my house tonight:

TV viewing for us is not passive. It is definitely interactive. Anyone who doesn't believe that all the problems we are seeing in society are much the result of the media kids are exposed to . . . needs to come spend some time at my house.

And yes, AJ has already come to me crying because he lost a fight. He did get hurt a little, but he was mostly upset that he didn't win the $6 in prize money offered to the champion. 'Course that's what you get when you let your opponent be the ring judge.

It IS a Boy!

Well, we have our baby. We finally got him yesterday, after I spent the whole day cajoling, begging, threatening, and insisting that AJ get his school work done. There were times I thought maybe I was being a bit hard on him, but his attention was just elsewhere, and it took me forever to get him to buckle down and work. But finally we were able to do it. We went to the shelter and filled out the papers, paid our money and took our baby Nathan to the car. AJ was SO thrilled.






The older boys had chess club, so we dropped them off a block away at the church, and then AJ and I headed off to get puppy food, and to return the crate and collar which were broken and too small. AJ and Nathan fell asleep in the car on the way to the store.



Getting him home yesterday was intersting. I thought our Alsatian, Princess, would have some issues with him coming into her home. The truth is, our Shepherd is terrified of him. He has snarled, growled, and even snapped a little at her a couple times. It's nothing I'm worried about. I checked it out at the shelter today, and now think what they told me--that Nathan has already attached somewhat to me and is being very protective of me. I think he's also a bit jealous of attention I pay to her when he's around. So we're being very careful of their interactions, but I think with time, assurance, and training, the two dogs will be best buds. I do think Nathan might be the leader though.


Nathan also appears to be a little nervous around Josh. It's not evident all the time, just occasionally. I confirmed today with the girls who work at the shelter that he was probably mistreated or abused by a young man or teen boy. So Josh is allowed to only play with him and treat him sweetly, and has to do nothing "bad." Nathan truly loves the younger two boys. He licks Stephen on the face every time he gets around him. His cute little tail wags constantly when he is with either of the two. They have chased him, walked him, laid next to him, on him and under him, thrown toys for him, and loved on him all . . . day . . . long. Poor pup hit a point tonight where he kept moving away from anyone who'd mess with him because he just wanted to SLEEP!!! He is now zonked in his crate, and I haven't heard a peep out of him. I did have to chase Stephen off my bed early this afternoon because he smelled so "doggie."


As for the dog himself, he is on meds for hookworms and earmites or maybe a fungus. Other than that, he seems to be housebroken, bites on us a little--but only like any puppy, tries to sniff the trash (but is figuring out that he isn't allowed to do that pretty quickly), and loves to follow us around. He's a cute little thing, and I feel good about the decision to get him every time I see him, even though it is a lot of work taking care of a "baby."


So there he is--our boy--Nathan. AJ keeps thinking of new names for him. I've encouraged AJ to call him Nathan (he originally wanted to stick with the shelter name), until we really get to know him. Mostly I just wanted AJ to have some time to really decide whether he wanted to rename the pup or not. I haven't come up with anything witty yet. Oh yeah . . . the new dog owner? He's crashed too. Hopefully dreaming sweet dreams of his new best friend!

Happy Birthday, DOG.

I forgot on Valentine's Day to wish our sweet Shepherd a happy birthday. She was five-years-old. We got her as a puppy at a Mission's Auction at church. She drives me crazy, but she is a very good dog. Even though my dad bought her for the boys, she is MY dog. She follows me everywhere. And she knows I'm talking about her even when I just say "dog." She comes to me when I say it. If you think taking pictures of three wild boys is hard, try adding an ADHD dog into the mix. Interesting.

The night we remembered her birthday we got her a doggie rug. I excused the expenditure as a "birthday present," but actually it is an attempt to get her to sleep in my room without sleeping on my bed. We also had cake and ice cream. Wish I could say that I planned that for her birthday as well, but it was really just 'cause we wanted cake. She didn't get any.

Still, she's a good dog and we love her. As long as she doesn't eat our cake.

War Games and Such

We had to walk down a long pier to get to the carrier. The boys told me they had to climb up numerous flights of steep metal steps on the outside of the ship to get to their berths. I, on the other hand, slept in officers quarters quite near the hanger. They slept in berths stacked five-high. I shared a room for four with one other woman.

One of Stephen's favorite things to do was to play in the cockpits of the airplanes. He and AJ also rode in a flight simulator, and they LOVED it. (I'd have tossed my cookies!)

Look out folks! He's now armed with more than a capgun or water pistol. And he's dangerous with those!

For some reason, this entire trip inspired poses of warfare and battle. Can anyone explain that to me?

Designed by a Big Boy!!!

Last weekend we went on a Cub Scout trip. I am convinced that the whole idea was planned and designed by men who were once little boys and haven't forgotten it. We went to Patriot's Point in Charleston, SC. While we were there for two nights, we slept aboard the aircraft carrier Yorktown. We were able to explore much of the carrier, plus a submarine, a battleship, and a Coast Gaurd cutter. We also took a short excursion to Fort Sumter where the Civil War began.

I was less than enthused about the trip. I had heard from those who went several years ago how cold it was, and I anticipated so much climbing and walking that it would be confirmed how out of shape I am physically. In addition, I'm finally starting to have more stable days when it comes to the anxiety and panic attacks I have suffered from, but both the driving and the stress of long trips tend to kick it all up again. In spite of my reticence, I reminded myself that my two little boys were thrilled we were going, and I worked very hard not to complain, not to say no to anything, and to enjoy the trip and being with them. I was not disappointed.

It was actually a great trip. On the drive I listened to some teaching CD's which really challenged and encouraged me in my relationship to my beloved Jesus. I spent time talking to Him about all kinds of things, and asked Him particularly to help me sleep, remind me to take my meds, and to give me the stamina to keep up with the boys. I was also desperately in need of His strengthening of my trust in Him to take care of the boys because they slept with the other men and boys in the guys berth, and so they were out of my sight and care from Taps until after Reville. As He always is, Jesus was faithful and relieved my stress and worry. I slept great, felt great (except for sore, tired feet, but I can deal with that at Disney World, so I figured I couldn't complain about it), and woke every morning even before Revillie to take my meds.

Being with the boys was just the best. Their excitement and enthusiasm was delightful. And I am convinced that the whole concept of this trip was designed by men who hadn't forgotten that little boys love to steer, push buttons, flip switches, climb, pretend, and imagine. The boys did enough of it, and brought home their overflow, dressing up in army gear and playing war for days afterward. I took about a billion pictures, so it was really fun for me also--to have new subject matter to photograph.

The funniest part of the weekend was Sunday when we finally left. Girls may cry because they can't get their hair combed just right, or because somebody makes fun of their new dress, but boys cry because they gotta leave the ship! And mine did. Proving, of course, that it was a great trip. I'd even do it again. (In a few years!)

A Boy and His Pig

Everybody likes the ginuea pig, and he certainly doesn't lack for attention, but Stephen has a special love for Nibs. And although the boy would NEVER DREAM of kissing a girl, he will kiss a guinea pig!